MarsViolet

Heyyy!  Long time, no Vox. 

Last month's issue of Ad Busters magazine inspired me to limit my electronics time and redirect that energy and time to other pursuits.  I am refreshed.  Items on the perpetual mental To Do List are done.

What I Did On My Vacation From Electronics

Finished knitting my husband's scarf on small size 6 needles using black Debbie Bliss yarn.  It turned out a sleek, urban looking man scarf.

Read (or reread) a couple of books:  A Woman's Book of Strength + A Woman's Book of Power by Karen Andes; Little Earthquakes by Jennifer Weiner; 99 Coffins by David Wellington

Cleaned and organized the garage.  Discovered that despite our downsizing we still have room for improvement.  Found more ugly, dark corporate clothes that don't fit anymore on so many levels.   

Learned I can do 100 pound squats -- fifteen times  yea me!

Became a platinum blonde and got a new haircut that I Love

Waxed my car by hand

Practiced handstitching and read about applique in Natalie Chanin's Alabama Stitch Book

Daydreamed and wondered where I could see myself in 5 years

Turned a sharp eye onto our spending

Found a couple of day hikes nearby for us to enjoy

 

Once a long time ago we completely disconnected the TV for about a year and I only had internet access at my work.  I think that was extreme.  Taking a break is more realistic.  Besides I would miss news on BBC America, the live music and Dan Rather on HD Net, Bill Moyers on PBS, and Oprah. 

That said, less TV & computer time meant more interesting conversations with Mr. Mars that started with "I was thinking..." and ended with OH! maybe that would be cool..."   The dishes were cleaned and floors swept more often. 

I'm learning about balance.  I can take a vacation and never leave home by simplifying and redirecting my focus.    

 

I hope this video works...

 

Sunday Nite... Back of the House...

House of the Blues on Sunset Blvd, Hollywood, that is

 

the spot where we lined up with all the others waiting to meet the band.  LAX security could learn a thing or two from the security at the HoB... a team of bouncers checked everyone in... handheld wanding, prolonged pat down of pockets, ticket checking, hand stamping, arm banding and then they slap a sturdy pass sticker on your shirt... everyone the same, fast and with a good attitude.  

The Noir crowd... heavy booted guys with hair to their waists or the other extreme, shaved, tattoo'd, pierce'd, a sprinkling of chicks.. all ages, all in black, all chill and laid back. 

Security led us into the pit in front of the stage.  I'm glad I had the chance to see it empty.  Above the stage are symbols for all the world's religions with the words All Are One.  On the ceiling were portraits in relief of the great musicians, all in white and lit so they hovered above angelic.  The walls are covered in outsider art.  Stairs on either side of the stage lead up to the second balcony level.  In the middle of LA slick the House of Blues is a juke joint... a roadhouse.  

In groups of five we go up the stairs to where the band is sitting.  Everyone is surprisingly hush.  The HoB staff gives off the impression that we're not to hang out too long.  Smiling, I shake hands with everyone and introduce myself.  Collecting autographs doesn't particularly interest me.  I was happy to meet the guys but really, I'm there to simply meet Al.  At the end of the table, there he is... a glass of red wine and round glasses flipped up.  I tell him that I'm a Texas gal and he laughs and says that he's a Texas gal too... (his ranch is in El Paso).  heh..  Meeting someone you admire for their talent but do not really know is unique.  I decided it was enough to have a sense of Al's energy, share a laugh and to say thank you for all these years of music.  I asked if I could take a picture with him and was thrilled when he stuck out a leg and told me to sit on his lap. (aaugh, gotta Vox error message loading it..) 

Time for beer and something to eat before the show. 

 

Hemlock then Meshuggah then Ministry   My ears are still ringing.  Hemlock's sound was raw and I liked them better than Meshuggah.  Ministry was intense, super loud and played some of their older, political stuff about Dubya... what can I say?  they were tight... Ministry played behind panels of chain link fencing (?).. honest, the fencing was irritating... but, whatever.   We had a great night.      

I'M GOING TO SEE and MEET ONE OF MY HEROS TONIGHT !!!!!  

!!!!!!!!!!!

Al Jourgensen

Industrial Metal Rocker, founder of Ministry, who also wrote lyrics that became a personal mantra

tonight at the House of Blues on Sunset Boulevard, the last Ministry tour

I'm giddy.... Okay, Okay, here's the story...

Saturday evening I had a meltdown.. all work and no play makes MarsViolet a raging emotional bitch.  Eckhart Tolle would have had a field day with all the ego bouncing around the room.   It wasn't pretty and I'm not proud of how I handled it but I had a valid point.  A broken car and a tight budget means I've pretty much been housebound for two weeks besides trips to the gym and grocery store.   "Even convicts get time out for good behavior!!"  I screamed, behaving wretchedly, but too frustrated to care.  

Today, 10am phone rings and it's Mr. Mars calling from work (his turn to work on Sunday)

Mr:  Hey! mornin, you just get up?

Me:  hey honey, no, I've been up... how's it goin?

Mr:  fine, umm, wasn't Ministry supposed to be in town?

Me: [looking at calendar] yea, but, I think they are gone now.  they were just playing a few nights

Mr:  hmmmmmm..... no, I'm pretty sure they are playing tonight because I JUST BOUGHT TWO VIP TICKETS WHICH INCLUDES A BACKSTAGE PASS AND MEETING THE BAND !!!!!!!!!   

Me: [pretty sure I stopped breathing]  Whaaaa?!!!  Honey!!!!  no way... REALLY???!!!!!   [tearing up]   I get to MEET AL ????   aaaauuughhh!!!   You are amazing!!   

Mr:  yea, and we get a gift bag from the band .....

*************

Ah!  priceless!!!

I understand that Al might seem like an unlikely hero with the drug abuse and whatever else is associated with industrial metal.   Here's why I say he's one of my heros.  (Of course, Mr. Mars, my ultimate hero, knows this which elevates his surprise to atmospheric levels of loving kindness.)   

I guess it was about 18 years ago, (scary!) when my friend Clint (love ya wherever ya are) moved the CD's, pizza boxes and big gulp cups that always covered his floor so we could sit in front of his speakers and he played Jesus Built My Hodrod for me.   At the beginning, before the mad racing guitar starts, is Al and others talking... I'll never forget it.  Clint giving me that sideways glance, nodding like he knew I my mind was about to be blown open. 

What passes the knowledge I don't always understand.  I don't question it.  Some understanding, a release, clicked inside me and here's what they say:

----  Hey, git this... nobody with good car needs to be justified.. and I'll tell you why...
I come a long way since I believed in anything... I come halfway around the world...

---  What are you talkin about?  

Where you come from is gone
Where you thought you were goin to, weren't never there
And where you are, ain't no good, unless you can get away from it

--- You understand?

--- I think I do.....

I tried to upload the whole 8 minute Hotrod but, sorry, something went wrong, the intro is in my Audio files...  I'm not sure what's happened but I had a feck of a time getting this post uploaded. 

What indulgence always makes your grocery list?

D.L. Jardine's Peach Salsa

Fresh, sweet / hot salsa with the right consistency and Texas salsa flavor. 

http://www.jardinefoods.com/store_category.html?cat=2

Spoon it over scrambled eggs -- you won't be disappointed.

I buy it at my grocery store, Ralphs, which is owned by Kroger, so maybe you can buy it there too...

 

http://www.personalityzone.com/    Kristine in my 'hood took the survey... I thought why not give it a try?  just for grins...  

I picked up a few "Buy one get one half books" and Eckhart Tolle's A New Earth. 

Anyone else into this book?  or tuning into Oprah's online classes? 

I'm in the middle of Chapter Three -- The Core of Ego -- whoo!  heady stuff (punny, haha)

Here's one of my favorite passages...

"The ego isn't wrong; it's just unconscious.  When you observe ego in yourself, you are beginning to go beyond it.  Don't take the ego too seriously.  When you detect egoic behavior in yourself, smile.  At times you may even laugh.  How could humanity have been taken in by this for so long?  Above all, know that the ego isn't personal.  It isn't who you are.

If you consider the ego to be your personal problem, that's just more ego."

Hahahahahha  ah, that's good. 

Another part I cheered for was his exercise to guide awareness to the inner body -- inner energy, our life energy.  Close your eyes and find out if there is life inside your hands, he writes and goes on to explain how body awareness anchors us in the present moment, is a "doorway out of the prison that is the ego", strengthens the immune system and healing.   Yay!  Meditative energy work, grounding if you will, discussed in a mainstream bestseller.   

It's not a relaxing read, rather it asks for soulsearching.  A bit repetitive at times but I can see why -- to help the understanding sink in.  I read a few parts of it outloud to Mr. Mars and we talked about whether or not we are the sum of our experiences.  Tolle defines "me and my story" as identifying with ego.  One way he defines awakening is "You realize your true identity as consciousness itself, rather than what consciousness had identified with."   Beings which are more than our life experiences.  Breathe a sigh of relief!   Awakening to the idea of being more than the place, family, religion, role or race you were born into!   

The price of gas is still damn near $4/gallon, one of our autos is still on the fritz and I'm still wondering about the direction of my life's purpose but, hey, my consciousness gets to laugh at my ego's foolishness.  Good news!  I'll read on and hope Tolle will get around to life's purpose.

Below are the other books I recently read and liked, each for a different reason.  13 Bullets is a fast paced vampire tale that the author started as a blog story and it turned into a novel (cool)... not your Anne Rice kinda vamp, no!   The heros are the vamp killers -- Loved it!   Good In Bed is fiction not instructional and an honest chick lit story.  The Knitting Circle delves into grief and sisterhood and well, knitting.  Storm Front is a fun action read where the wizard, Harry Dresden is the Columbo of the supernatural, okay, maybe he's the McGuyver.     

 

 

   

Sanctuary

curled up
   or stretched out

sunny daydreams
   or darkness whispers

I wonder at the colors of the sky..

... at the state of the human world

... at stillness, a hummingbird's wings, honeysuckle smells, the pulse of seasons

I suspend my grasping

I surrender to my breathe

 

 

 

Such a great weekend... Saturday I planted these tiny white flowers in a shady part of my garden'.   Instantly they brightened up that spot. 

Happily dirty I put a rosemary in a container and made a new flowerbed in the front yard for two varieties of lavender.  The bees are thrilled.  Before I could even get them in the ground, the bees were landing on the lavender blooms.   

The hummingbirds were busy at the feeder and I caught a nice picture of one in flight then it darted off.  

AND, I'd love to show it to you but for whatever reason I get an error from Vox when I tried to upload more photos... isn't that special... 

 

I don't know where all the energy came from but I got so much done.  Today I completely emptied my closet and purged anything that didn't fit.  I don't have much left but at least I know I like what's there.   

I put on the remaining suits from my old office job for the first time in three years.  Out they went... I can't believe I ever wore those clothes.  Nevermind that they hung on me, none of them reflected my personality.   It was an eerie trip down memory lane.  Out with the old; In with the new.      

Satisfying weekend... hanging at the house with Mr. Mars and Lacy. 

I'll try to add more pics tomorrow....

Seven weeks ago I walked into a personal training gym and signed up for 10 weeks training, nutrition counseling, and body map.  I could do maybe 10 push ups....

Today I did two sets of a Hang Clean and Press !!   My first time ever...

Until today if someone asked me to do a hang clean and press I would have thought they wanted a shirt laundered.   First 10 reps with the bar only and second time with weight, I made it 7 reps.  I found these pics online to show ya what it looks like. 

I've been working HARD for my trainers and learning lots... training 4 times per week... doing cardio... hiking... eating protein, healthy veg.. taking vitamins... drinking tons of water... yeah, I'm proud.   And I feel really good, okay, except for my sore arms.  :)